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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22520353">The Headache List</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/obvioustheory/pseuds/obvioustheory'>obvioustheory</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEAL Team (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 11:08:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,599</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22520353</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/obvioustheory/pseuds/obvioustheory</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Eric Blackburn has a list, not one he’s ever actually written down, but one he spends a lot of time thinking about. Although it used to change on a fairly regular basis, the last few years have seen a few new inclusions but the rankings have stayed the same. It’s his headache list.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Lisa Davis/Sonny Quinn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>178</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Headache List</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Eric Blackburn has a list, not one he’s ever actually written down, but one he spends a lot of time thinking about. Although it used to change on a fairly regular basis, the last few years have seen a few new inclusions but the rankings have stayed the same. It’s his headache list.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>10. Cerberus </strong>
</p>
<p>While not technically a team member, Cerberus gives him the least trouble of anyone on Bravo. Like all working dogs, Cerberus has been meticulously trained for almost any scenario imaginable and very rarely misbehaves. In fact, when it looks like Cerberus is misbehaving, he’s usually still following orders from somebody. Eric used to think that the dog randomly curled up with people other than Brock after some missions, until he realised Brock was sending him to teammates who needed some support. He used to think he occasionally tripped Derek from Alpha Team on the o-course, till he realised Full Metal was using the dog in a juvenile game of make Derek’s life harder for his own amusement. He used to think Cerberus occasionally nosed through Sonny’s things and stole his favourite hat, until he realised that Spencer was behind it. Pretty much the whole team has their own ways of misappropriating Cerberus’s training for their own good.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>9. Vic Lopez </strong>
</p>
<p>The kid’s spot on the list is only low because he hasn’t been on the team long enough to give Eric any real trouble. It’s probably only a matter of weeks until Quinn, with or without Spencer, convince him to do something truly stupid, with or without alcohol, that Eric will have to explain or, preferably, hide from the brass. Lopez is a solid SEAL, does his job without complaining, voices his opinion only when asked and doesn’t question orders. Basically, he’s the opposite of three-quarters of Bravo and Eric’s still not exactly sure how he ended up on the team.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>8. Lisa Davis </strong>
</p>
<p>Lisa Davis has really only given Eric any serious trouble on two occasions. The first was obviously when she got arrested and didn’t tell him until it was way too late. Yeah, he’s still pissed about that one. The second one happened first, her not-so-platonic relationship with Sonny Quinn. Not that Eric would ever admit that he knows anything about it. As far as he’s concerned it never happened. He figured in Mexico something between them was shifting, when their banter started veering into more and more personal territory but they never seemed to spend any time alone together. By the start of the Gucci mission he’d already figured out they were together, Sonny’s complete personality change made it obvious. Then a few months later Sonny showed up hungover with a black-eye and the two of them couldn’t even look in the other’s general direction and he just knew, it was over. But Eric knows nothing about any inappropriate relationships on Bravo and you can’t prove otherwise.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>7. Trent Sawyer </strong>
</p>
<p>The most trouble Trent Sawyer has given Eric also came due to personal issues. Trent was originally drafted to Echo team but put in for a transfer after his wife and his team’s EOD had an affair. Trent already had a reputation as one of the best medics on DEVGRU, so of course Bravo took him. But a newly single and pissed off Trent Sawyer, when Sonny Quinn was around? Disaster. It was either a miracle or pure dumb luck that one of them wasn’t arrested or killed. They were both constantly causing trouble for the best part of two years, he lost count of how many times he had the two of them in his office after yet another incident. In the past three years, Trent seems to have finally calmed down a bit, although Eric suspects that’s only because he can’t recover from a hangover like he used to.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>6. Full Metal </strong>
</p>
<p>Scott Foster, otherwise know exclusively as Full Metal, didn’t so much leave Alpha team as he was booted off. Full Metal was a great team leader, but even great leaders don’t get to stay in command after they punch a Lieutenant Commander during an Ops briefing. But of course, Hayes wanted him to join Bravo, so Full Metal ended up becoming Eric’s problem. After such a serious infraction, most people would have realised their career was in some serious jeopardy and behaved themselves until the focus on them died down for a while. But not Full Metal, he stayed exactly as he was and that was precisely the problem. Eric had spent way too long justifying why someone with Full Metals’ reputation and track record hadn’t been unceremoniously booted from the Navy, and his joking about burying bodies over the coms was not helping anyone.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>5. Ray Perry </strong>
</p>
<p>Most people would expect Ray Perry to be much further down the list. Most people didn’t know Ray Perry that well. Sure, he was a good Christian and somehow managed to juggle a happy family life with an insanely demanding work schedule. But he was also extremely opinionated and refused to change his mind or consider the perspectives of others. His extreme stubbornness, which often clashed with Spencer’s extreme stubbornness, was a constant pain in the ass for Eric. Once Perry had made up his mind, there was no changing it, consequences be damned. And if it pissed anyone off, Perry would just ignore it and wait until they forgot why they were pissed at him. Or wait until another calamity came along, and give a half-assed apology that someone would except because they needed his help with whatever cluster-fuck had since come along.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>4. Clay Spenser </strong>
</p>
<p>Clay Spencer earned his place on the list before he earned his place on Bravo. As soon as he was accepted into Green Team there was talk all around DEVGRU about Ash Spencers’ kid and how he was even better than his father. And Jason Hayes’ ego, did not take the challenge to his legacy well. Spencer might have a lot of qualities that his father lacked, empathy, compassion, loyalty, but he’s also got a lot of his father’s less desirable traits too, stubbornness, ego and brashness. Spencer’s biggest problem, he’s one of the greatest and he knows it. Spencer is right on track to running Bravo one day and he’s definitely going to be a complete pain in the ass when he does.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>3. Jason Hayes </strong>
</p>
<p>Jason Hayes is a legendary SEAL, and a legendary pain in the ass. He has almost zero respect for any kind of authority and there’s barely a rule in the book he hasn’t at least tried to break. Jason has zero interest in being told “no” and will do whatever he wants, consequences be damned. The number of times Eric’s been pulled into some three-hour crisis meeting about something Hayes did and had to justify keeping him as the head of Bravo is ridiculous. At this point they might as well just keep a conference room on permanent reservation. Just wait till the new head of DEVGRU finds out about Hayes and the new exercise physiologist he’s so invested shoving down their throats. Actually, he’s kind of looking forward to it, Eric gets his kicks where he can, he deserves it.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>2. Sonny Quinn </strong>
</p>
<p>Where does he even start with Sonny Quinn? Eric knew exactly what was he was in for the second Sonny was drafted. Of course, everyone on base had heard about the Green Team recruit who had somehow: 1) stolen a police cruiser, 2) snuck into onto the base and 3) parked it, upside down no less, in the middle of the o-course before the final day of Green Team evaluations. And really it was just the start of the ridiculous antics that would only escalate over time. He’d overheard Jason telling Sonny that he didn’t know how he wasn’t kicked out of the Navy, but Eric did. Him! The number of times he’d had to hide something that Sonny did from the brass didn’t bear thinking about but it was a significant portion of his life and his career. Sonny had turned him into a professional fixer.</p>
<hr/>
<p>
  <strong>1. Brock Reynolds</strong>
</p>
<p>It’s generally assumed that Brock Reynolds is a solid sailor and world class animal handler who doesn’t put so much as a toe out of line. People only think that because Reynolds is quiet. They think that because he doesn’t spend his time mouthing off and disobeying direct orders that he doesn’t do anything wrong. The problem is what Reynolds is doing instead is observing. He knows everyone on the team better than they know themselves. He knows exactly how to push all their buttons, without anyone realising what he was doing. It took Eric months after he’d joined the team for Eric to even realise what he was doing. Reynolds baited everyone on the team for his own amusement. And he managed to set up others to take the fall for him. Most of the time, when Sonny or Trent get in trouble for some dumb stunt at the Bulkhead, Brock was the instigator. And he uses Spencer or now Lopez to set up the stunt so Quinn and Sawyer don’t realise it was him. Quinn’s practical jokes? Quinn might have the idea but Reynolds gives him the logistical support to actually make it happen. When Full Metal and Perry got lost on a training exercise for three hours, Brock tampered with the map.</p>
<p>If the team ever finds out all the stunts Brock Reynolds has pulled over the years, he’ll either be a legend or a dead man.</p>
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